[Most Recent Entries]
Below are the 4 most recent journal entries recorded in
|Thursday, July 18th, 2002|
Yeah...so it looks like I'm off to New York again. Seriously...I think I have had the best summer anyone could possibly have! and the best part is that it isn't even over yet!!!
(I hope all of you have sensed that sarcasm...if not...what the hell are you smoking??? can I have some??)
|Monday, June 24th, 2002|
Ok....so, like, 2 weeks ago my grandma passed away...finally she's not suffering anymore. That's good. But, now my grandpa is super sick (worse than before). So, for the past 2 weeks he's been in the hospital, and has been getting better, well, as 'better' as someone classified as a medical miracle can get....Ok, so yesterday my mom and I go food shopping. When we come home there's a message on the answering machine. Nothing unusual. Just my aunt saying she called to give us an update on him. So...we got to sleep....yadda yadda yadda....wake up this morning and my mom tells me my aunt called again. Now I'm thinking something's up. Unfortunately, I was right. She called to say my grandfather's heart stopped beating. Now...he signed a DNR, but the dr was there, (he's super attached to the family) and said shock him once, so they did. The good thing....he's still alive. The bad thing....he's still alive and suffering. I don't know what to think. I mean, I was all the way in frickin Wisconsin while my grandma died in NY...and now I have to go through the same thing with my grandpa. Argh...I don't know what I want...I mean, I want him to die b/c that way he'll be with my grandma again, and he won't be suffering, but I want to say goodbye, so I want him to stay alive, but I know I won't be able to go to NY. Oh...and on top of that, my dad's last paycheck is oh, in about a week or so, and he doesn't have a new job. Wonderful, huh? Oh yeah....it was also announced at this board meeting thing that he was asked to resign....why? b/c the bishop is an asshole and now that my dad's done the bish's dirty work, he's been sent on his way! FUCK! Why hire a man to change everything when you don't want the fucking change!?!? ARGH!!!!!
So yeah...that's my life about now.....just peachy isn't it???? Current Mood: blah
|Wednesday, June 12th, 2002|
Ok...so my grandma has been super sick and on the verge of dying for the past 18 months. Well, last Tuesday she finally passes away. The worst part for me was the fact that I wasn't there to say good-bye. I was even going to call Tuesday morning just to tell her I love her, but I didn't, which just made me feel even worse. Oh, and now my grandfather is in the hospital in total renal failure, and severe pneumonia. Sure, he *could* go on dialysis, but that would only be if he would consent to it (funny!) and then we'd have to attempt to find a doctor who would be willing to put him through dialysis in his condition. Now they're (the hospital, his doctor, etc.) is going to see if they can have someone aspirate his lungs so he can breathe easier. This means my family and I will soon be heading back to New York for another funeral.
Personally, I don't know if I can deal with that right now. I mean, it was hard enough to go to my grandmother's wake and all, but then soon after have to go through her husband's!? Not to mention the fact that this is the first time I've ever lost anyone (to death) that I was close to. And God only knows ho my aunts and uncles will be able to deal with it!
I'm, just so run down and exhausted. I just graduated high school! I should be happy, not depressed! argh....
So yeah, that's my life right now. Sounds like fun, huh?
|Wednesday, April 3rd, 2002|
|my flipping luck!!
Ok, so I've been talking to this guy, Peter, on the internet a lot, and well, I've sort of developed a crush on him, I guess you could say. The only problem is, we haven't actually met since he lives in Florida, and I'm in Wisconsin. So, I'm actually in Florida finally, and I'm staying with my aunt who lives about 2 hours away from where he lives. (grr...) No problem, I have friends who live near him, and I'll be visiting them. So, I go and visit my friends Ali and Nikki, and I'm all excited b/c I think I'm going to meet him finally. Awesome, right? You would think so! So, I give him a call. Uh-oh...not home. No problem, Nikki is friends with him and has his cell #. Give it a call....voicemail... grrr. Of course, I'm too chicken to leave a message, so I just keep calling, hoping to hear him, but all I get in 3 days is voicemail. :o( He's out of town. So, Ali and Nikki bring me back to my aunt's house. About 5/6hrs later (maybe more) Ali calls. Guess who's home and imed her asking about me? PETER!! Argh! I missed him by 5 hours! Well, that's the story of my life. So, now I'm online, hoping that he'll come on soon. (like *that's* going to happen!) *sigh*